To Thine Own Self Be True

Ever heard the phrase, "we are our own worst enemy?" I think it is a universal part of human nature to want to be appreciated and to feel that we have value. Generally, we look outward to others hoping to get that appreciation, yet even if we find it, inside we are beating ourselves up for whatever is not perfect now or how imperfect it has been in the past. Worse still would be beating ourselves up for something we might do poorly in the future.

Take heart! Here's a phrase I learned that has become an affirmation with me: "That's just what is! But, I have the power to change this instant!" Take heart, because it is true! Remind yourself as often as you feel you want or need to so that you can let that personal guilt trip loose and concentrate on how you want things to be. You have the power always and it is there anytime you choose to use it.

Being true to yourself would be to encourage yourself--to uplift and build yourself up. The good news about that is that you have the power right now and that is a great decision to make. When we can get to the point where what we tell ourselves is more important than what anyone else tells us, I think that is total personal freedom.

I had a boss tell me one day, "your sales really suck!" I know how hard it was for him to say that to me and the natural reaction might have been to cower and find excuses and reasons and people or circumstances to blame. Certainly if there were things I could have done and didn't, I would have a place to improve immediately. There were many times in my life that this would have been true. Strangely enough, when this event happened, I had been doing everything that I possibly could have and more, so I said, "you're absolutely right! My sales suck." Not the response most people would expect, but by acknowledging what is, I took all the hurt out of that reprimand. And, it is true that sales were not what I wanted either, but, the key is that I wasn't beating myself up, but lifting myself up. I could stand firm that I was doing everything possible that I could think of. There is serious power in that.

If you even acknowledge what is (some people call this "reality"), do it with a smirk, but matter-of-factly: "That's just what is!" All the while inside you are totally in charge building your true self into what you truly want. Tell a child often enough they are stupid and uncoordinated and that is what they will be. Tell a child often enough they are smart and sophisticated and special and that is what they will be. That is true of all of us in that what we say to ourselves is our own truth. To thine own selves be true.